I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
