better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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