she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
How's work?
Spinning.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
