He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
