remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
