there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize