It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize