Cold hands, warm shart.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
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