I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I have fence marks all over my body
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
