Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
