Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
