if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize