I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
