You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
