so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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