His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize