Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
