Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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