Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
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