I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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