You can't motorboat a personality
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
