U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Randomize
