im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Randomize
