Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
