you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
