time to smoke my breakfast
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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