Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
