Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
