Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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