forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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