And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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