We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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