I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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