Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
