I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
