At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize