Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
