u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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