Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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