So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
