i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
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