That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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