Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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