All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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