Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
