So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
