hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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