As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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