That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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