I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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