I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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